life will tear you apart you are so fucked up
Do I have any willpower to do it?
Probably not.
I hate uncertainties and still afraid of the answer.
Anyway I'm tired of... what would you call it? Taking initiative or imposing myself on someone?
Feels like the second actually. To the point where it becomes humiliating.
So to hell with it. Come what may.
If I'm not needed, then so be it.
I'm used to it. Or was used to it... No big difference.